Why Are Women Pressured To Wait For Sex, But Men Aren’t?

I remember a conversation my class had back when I was going to high school. A boy said it’s okay for a girl to wait for sex, but if a boy hasn’t had sex by 16 he’s gay. It was such a ridiculous statement because what if every girl actually did wait to have sex? Who would boys have sex with? Other boys? Animals? Sometimes, people don’t realize how ridiculous they sound when they say certain things, especially when they’re so quick to label someome as gay for it.

I remember a post I saw on Facebook of a woman completely fully clothed. No arms showing. No legs showing. I believe even her hair was covered, too. She was dressed in what looked like a long denim dress. The picture was captioned, “You can still be sexy fully clothed”. I like the message of the photo because sometimes, women don’t feel attractive unless they’re dressed very skimpy. But at the same time, it looked weird seeing her with all those clothes on. To me, she looked like she had a disease and they were trying to cover her so it wouldn’t spread! (I know that probably sounds like an exaggeration, but that’s exactly what I felt like what she looked like dressed like that.) It made me think that something was very wrong about how men view women in this society.

I also think about the many television shows and movies I have seen where a girl’s parents or some other male authority figure in the show is breathing down her back about not having sex and trying their best to keep as many boys away from her as possible. But on the same shows and movies, those people are not as hard on the boys about having sex and actually encourage them to get girlfriends at really young ages.

Why is this? Why does this society put so much pressure on women about sex, telling them what age is appropriate for them to have sex, what clothes are appropriate for them to wear, etc., but boys are encouraged to be involved with girls and have sex at really young ages? What does this society have against women and sex? Where does this stigma come from?

Many sources say that girls and women should wait for sex because it can bring about unwanted pregnancies or they can get pregnant by a man who will step out on her and their child. There’s also sources that tell girls and women to wait for sex because of sexually transmitted diseases.

I completely agree with waiting on having sex to protect yourself from sexually transmitted diseases and to prevent unwanted pregnancies or avoid getting pregnant by a boy or man who will step away from his job as a father. However, I feel like boys and men aren’t told to wait for sex to avoid getting girls and women pregnant at the wrong time or to protect themselves from sexually transmitted diseases like girls and women are. Although there’s a little truth in telling women to wait to prevent pregnancies and STDs, I also feel like they’re nothing more than shaming and scare tactics that this society uses to try to control female sexuality.

I feel that men fear and are intimidated by female sexuality. I feel that is the reason why they try so hard to suppress it. I believe they are afraid and intimidated because they feel that women can have a lot of power over them through sex and their sexuality. They try to hide this by pushing the idea that they are superior to women and tell the world it’s okay for them to be with as many women as they want and get praised for it, but if a woman is with more than one man, she’s a “hoe”, “slut”, “bitch”, you name it!

I believe men are happy when they are with multiple women because it makes them feel they have all the sexual power and control, but when a woman has multiple men, it threatens their sexual power and control.

I feel that men tell women to wait for sex and dress so covered up that she shows no skin at all because they are happier and less intimidated with the idea that she’s not having sex (unless it’s with them) and is fully clothed.

There’s an article I found on Huffpost that I will link in this post that mentioned a few theories about why men are so afraid of female sexuality. It said this fear could be hardwired into men because just like in the animal kingdom, men want to perpetuate his own genes. If women are too sexual, they probably won’t be able to do that because she would’ve more than likely been with other men.

Another thing it brought up is that men are afraid of women being unfaithful to them because of the shame that comes with it from society, so they do everything they can to prevent it.

But I believe those theories the least. I believe most all that it has to do with the male ego & men trying to control female sexuality. This could be a lot deeper than what anyone thinks.

https://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/1289564

The Oversexualization of Women’s BodiesĀ 

Photo: Wikimedia Commons


I often wonder why so many people freak out whenever they see certain female body parts. I notice that many people have a lot to say when a woman is naked or dressed in revealing or tight clothing. I thought about the tribal women of some other countries who are naked or nearly naked most of the time. I feel like a lot of people don’t react to them the same way they react to women who are naked or dressed in revealing clothing here in America. Why is that? What is the difference between those women’s bodies and American women’s bodies? 

I believe so many people freak out about women’s naked bodies today because women’s bodies are extremely sexualized in this society. Many of those tribal women from other countries aren’t portrayed in that same manner. We are constantly bombarded with overly sexualized images of women’s bodies on the daily basis, whether it’s through strip clubs, pornography, magazines, TV shows, movies, or advertisements. They are all around us. Women’s bodies are depicted as something that is only used for sex or sexual satisfaction. So, when someone sees a woman’s body, that’s exactly what they think. They think sex and start freaking out. 

Women’s bodies are even sexualized long before they’re even adults. It starts when they’re little girls. I remember a picture I saw on Twitter where someone was calling out people who were commenting on a picture of Skai Jackson, saying things like, “Where’s her ass?” I’m thinking, she’s thirteen! Why are you worried about her body?! And I’m pretty sure a lot of those derogatory comments about her body were from grown men and that makes it even more disgusting! (Even if they weren’t grown men, that still doesn’t make it any better that her body is still being judged at such a young age.) I also remember looking at comments on Willow Smith’s “Fireball” video featuring Nicki Minaj, where people were wondering “where her curves were” because she was dressed in a body suit, and comparing her body to Nicki Minaj’s and wondering why her body “didn’t look like Nicki’s”. Willow Smith was eleven years old, I believe, at the time. So, not only were people comparing a little girl’s body to a grown woman’s, they compared her to a woman’s body that isn’t even realistic, being that we all know Nicki Minaj’s body has been surgically enhanced. And Nicki Minaj is even oversexualized herself, as we see how she is portayed on a regular basis! I also remember the comments geared towards Maddie Ziegler, the little girl dancing in Sia’s “Chandelier” video. The pedophilic comments coming from grown people just because she was in a body suit utterly disgusted me. Whether they were jokes or not doesn’t matter because even if they were, the fact that people think making pedophilic jokes about children is funny should tell everyone that there is something really wrong with this society! Everything isn’t a joke! Even shows like Toddlers & Tiaras look like they oversexualize little girls. The little girls are wearing makeup and dressed in over the top dresses and put on display for their looks when most of the girls on these shows are barely any older than ten years old. I also remember being in one of my seventh grade classes and the boys were comparing the sizes of the girls’ breasts in the class to the sizes of different fruits. I don’t think any girl in the class were older than thirteen or fourteen years old at the time. There are many other stories like this of people, young and old alike, talking about young girls’ bodies this way. It is disgusting and something should be done about it!

The oversexualization of women’s bodies is so bad that women are even shunned for using their breasts for what they are actually supposed to be used for. How many stories have we heard over the years of women being shamed or kicked out of places for breastfeeding?

All I want to know is, why is this happening? Why is this society so bent on sexualizing women’s bodies to the point where they begin targeting little girls? Why is it still being allowed or accepted, as a matter of fact?

I believe women’s bodies are being sexualized in this manner because this society is built on sexism. Women have been the victims of sexism for many, many centuries. We’re still looking at the residue and after effects of when sexist tensions were at its highest; when women couldn’t work certain jobs, when women couldn’t vote, when women couldn’t make the same wages as men on the same job, etc. We’re still looking at that and it hasn’t gone away.

Because I think the oversexualization of women’s bodies comes from a centuries-long battle with sexism in this society, I believe they’re trying to send a message saying, “Women are good for nothing more than sex and their bodies. And that’s all they should be used for”. And they start sending this message before they’re even teenagers.

A woman’s body is a natural thing and it should be viewed and accepted as such. No one should freak out just because they see a woman naked or dressed in clothes that reveal some skin. We have been conditioned to react to women’s bodies this way. It’s time to break away from that conditioning!