My Stance On Abortion 

Abortion is a very old practice that dates back to ancient times. It is the ending of a pregnancy by removing the fetus or embryo from a woman’s body. Abortions can be done with abortion-inducing drugs or surgery. 

Millions of women get abortions every year and for many different reasons. Some including financial, a partner, family member or other people convincing them to get one, bad “timing”, health, already having children, not wanting children at all, and simply not being ready or mature enough, amongst other reasons.

There’s one thing that many of these different reasons have in common. And that thing is they all could’ve been thought of prior to conceiving a child. This is why I am against abortion most of the time. People know what creates a child. They know what their situations and feelings are long ahead of time. They know if they want a child or not. They know what their finances are. They already know if they are mature enough or not. …You get the picture. THEY ALREADY KNOW. When someone already knows something isn’t right for them, yet decides to go through with it anyway, made a poor decision or is just irresponsible.

There are so many different forms of free and natural birth control out here for people to still be having children they don’t want or can’t afford and they are easily accessible. Pregnancy is one of the most avoidable things you can think of. Getting pregnant and then coming up with a reason to terminate the pregnancy later doesn’t make sense to me.

Some of the few abortion instances I actually agree with are the instances where a woman is a victim of incest or rape. I agree with abortion in cases like those because those situations were forced upon her against her will. She didn’t ask to be raped by a family member or some other man. And she certainly wasn’t asking to get pregnant. She didn’t have a say-so in those situations. So, if she chooses to get an abortion in those cases, I can understand.

I can also understand abortion if a woman did use proper birth control, but it failed. Condoms break. Pills and intrauterine devices don’t always work 100% of the time. And an unwanted pregnancy can happen. That is totally understandable.

I can understand health instances, too, where there may be severe complications during pregnancy that force an early pregnancy termination.

However, having consensual sex completely unprotected is a choice and the consequences that come with it are not unknown to anyone (Being “too young” to not know is not an excuse. Many youngsters get the sex ed talk as young as twelve years old, maybe younger).

I remember in one of my high school classes, there was a girl who left the class (for some reason I don’t remember), but left her purse. While she was gone, several other girls went through her purse and pulled things out. (To this very day, I wish I could’ve said or done something to stop it, but I was too afraid to do anything. I don’t remember if the teacher was gone or not. They might’ve been if they weren’t trying to stop it. But anyway…). They found some condoms in her purse and when she came back, they, along with most of the class, laughed and made fun of her for having condoms. These girls were supposedly her “friends”. She handled it well; even laughing along with them. But she said, “Girls are always supposed to have condoms on them.”

And she was right. As many girls that were getting pregnant and talking about abortion in that school, instead of laughing and making jokes, they should’ve been doing what she was doing. 

Women should always have condoms or some other form of birth control on them if they know they are sexually active, but aren’t trying to have kids. This same thing goes for men, too, because it seems like there’s never anyone holding men accountable in these situations and they are just as responsible for a woman getting pregnant at the wrong time as she is herself.

If you don’t want to have a child, either don’t have sex at all until you’re ready to have a child (abstinence) or use the numerous methods of birth control available. It’s time for us as a people to start being more responsible with the decisions we make. That is even more important when it comes to having children! A poor or irresponsible decision in anything negatively affects a child far more than it affects ourselves, whether we notice it or not.

Talking & Acting White or Black: What Is It?

(Photo: Flickr)

People have always told me that I talk white. I have a soft voice and I pronounce my words in full, including the ‘ing’s’ in a word. I always denied it. It was such a ridiculous statement. I know I was just being myself and couldn’t help how I spoke. I was speaking proper English. This is how people who know English are supposed to speak.

I thought about how people ask other people who speak like this, “Why do you talk/act so proper?” My own father asked me that once. We think that’s us asking, “Why are you talking and acting so white?” But, actually, it’s us asking, “Why are you speaking and acting so correctly. Because that’s what the word, “proper”, means; doing something correctly.

Apparently, many people are uncomfortable with black people speaking proper English and “acting” proper. I was never sure why. I thought there was no such thing as talking/acting white or talking/acting black. How can anyone act a color? I never knew where people got that from. It always sounded racist and stereotypical; basically encouraging black people to act and speak like they don’t know how.

But, one day, recently, I was sitting on my couch watching Alfonso Ribeiro on AFV (America’s Funniest Home Videos). I watched how he spoke and everything. Suddenly, it popped into my head, ‘There really IS a such thing as acting white!’

I figured this out, not as a criticism of how Alfonso Ribeiro acted and spoke on the show, but because watching him made me think of the history of black people in this country. It made me realize that there is a such thing as acting white. But it is of no fault of our own. 

Remember, black people, our original language(s), culture(s), and custom(s) were lost hundreds of years ago during slavery. We were forced to forget everything about ourselves and have been forbidden from reading and writing for many, many years. When we finally did get the opportunity to learn how to read and write, we adopted the English language and the “American” way of living and behaving, which is the white, European way.

Europeans, a.k.a. white people, were the people who were running the country back then and they’re still running the country today. Because of this, there is a such thing as acting white, but there is no such thing as acting black here. It’s either you speak and act to their standards or you’re the negatively stereotypical black person: ghetto, uneducated, unruly, violent, unintelligent, etc.

What we classify as “talking/acting black” is not really talking/acting black at all. It’s just a nonstandard version of the standard European way of talking and acting.

I now believe that, whether people know it or not, that “There is no such thing as acting white” and “You can’t act a color” are lies created and used to hide and sugar coat the fact that white people stole, stripped, and, later, replaced our original languages, cultures, and customs. Until we learn what our original languages, cultures, and customs were, we will always be speaking and acting as something we’re not.

Did Keri Hilson Diss Beyoncé? 

Rumors have been swirling around for years about how Keri Hilson dissed Beyoncé in her verse in the remix of her song, “Turnin’ Me On”. I know this is an old topic because this song came out years ago, but I want to write about it anyway because many people still talk about this to this day and still believe that she dissed, not only Beyoncé, but Ciara and Nicole Scherzinger, as well and are still against her for it.

I’m going to break this song down piece by piece from the lyrics and see what this song will reveal and see if this song is actually dissing these women.

“I ain’t tryin’ to start some mess. It’s just somethin’ on my chest that I need to get off ’cause you turnin’ me off.”

“Your vision cloudy if you think that you the best. You can dance, she can sing, but she need to move it to the…”

Even though Polow Da Don interrupted before she finished the line, it’s pretty obvious what she was saying was, “Move it to the left”, which is what Beyoncé says in her song, “Irreplaceable”. Also, we know that Beyoncé is a singer and dancer. So are Ciara and Nicole Scherzinger.

“She need to go have some babies. She need to sit down. She fake. Them other chicks ain’t even worth my time to talk about.”

In an interview, which I will have posted down below, Keri Hilson explained that this line is actually what people in the industry have been saying about her, so she put it onto this record. I think people think this line was about Beyoncé because people have been saying these same things about her for years, long before this song was released.

“Been had dollars, boy. Go on, get your money. Know you ain’t the only homie on me lined up. I ain’t turnin’ off. I stay turnin’ on. Go on and tell these folks how long I been writin’ your songs. I been puttin’ you on. Just check the credits, ho. And if you want me, you can find me in Decatur, ho. ‘Cause you turnin’ me off.”

So, apparently, she’s talking about someone she wrote songs for. This is what led me to the realization that she wasn’t dissing Beyoncé. How many songs has she written for Beyoncé? People say she wrote Beyoncé’s verse in the remix of Usher’s “Love In This Club”. When this song came out, people in the comments were saying, “How can she say this about Beyoncé when she only wrote one verse for her?” People didn’t realize that they were telling themselves that she wasn’t talking about Beyoncé right there. 

On the other hand, she has written songs for Ciara and The Pussycat Dolls, Nicole Scherzinger’s group, though. But I don’t think there’s enough proof in this song to make anyone think she is talking about them. She’s written songs for so many people. She could’ve been talking about anyone. 

Like she said in these interviews below, I think this song is a blanket statement about how other people were treating her in the music industry. That’s exactly what the lyrics sound like to me. 

And if she was talking about these women, clearly she’s saying they are being fake and doing wrong by her. She’s not saying this for no reason. Why shouldn’t she be able to say something about it? Is she supposed to let these women be fake and cross her over and not say anything about it at all? How come no one checked Beyoncé, Ciara, and Nicole Scherzinger to find out what they did to make her say this about them if they really thought this song was about them instead of being upset that she said this? I feel like this exposed how backwards people are.

At the end of the day, nobody really knows exactly who she’s talking about. People just heard this song and started speculating. Pulling names out of thin air. I think it’s really wrong to hold her accountable for dissing people that no one has any real proof of that she dissed. The only thing anybody can do with this song is speculate.

https://youtu.be/fxFdH27jHBM

https://youtu.be/7LzTZ9msh90


Why Black People Don’t Like The “All Lives Matter” Response

(Photo: Flickr)

The Black Lives Matter movement was started in 2012, after the murder of Trayvon Martin. His murderer, George Zimmerman, was acquitted of the crime and was able to walk free. Martin was an unarmed 17 year old. It is believed that because Martin was a teen and unarmed that the situation could’ve been handled much differently. Killing an unarmed teenager was deemed as excessive force, especially since Zimmerman wasn’t even an officer. He was just a neighborhood watch captain. 

Years after that, many other murders of black people by police that were deemed as unjust were caught on camera, including Mike Brown, Alton Sterling, Tamir Rice, Philando Castile, Sandra Bland, and Korryn Gaines, to name a few.

Black Lives Matter was started because it seems like this society doesn’t seem to care about the lives of black people and treat us very unfairly in the justice system compared to other groups of people, especially white people. Not very long after it was started, it got spun into a huge negative and caused a lot of controversy. The response to it was, “All lives matter”.

Black people are upset at this because it is taking away from the plight we are fighting for. Black Lives Matter does not mean that only black people’s lives matter or black people’s lives matter more than other people’s lives. Apparently, that’s what people think Black Lives Matter is, which is why they are responding like this. People also think Black Lives Matter means “anti-police”. That’s not what it means, either. What it means is black people’s lives matter, TOO; our lives are just as important as other people’s lives and we should be treated like it.

Hearing other black people, especially high profile black people, such as celebrities and politicians, saying “All lives matter” is even worst than a white or any other nonblack person saying it because other black people should be the main ones to know why Black Lives Matter was started and what its purpose is. It’s a little more understandable hearing it from nonblacks than other blacks. Hearing other black people say, “All lives matter” is majorly disappointing.

Saying “All lives matter” as a response to Black Lives Matter is pointless and just looks like a deflection. And why is it that “All lives matter” is a response to Black Lives Matter, but Blue Lives Matter was started to fight for the plight of law enforcement? If “All lives matter”, why do we need Blue Lives Matter? How come no one is telling them that “all lives matter”?

The fact that Blue Lives Matter was created to shed light on the injustices done against law enforcement shows that everyone knows why the Black Lives Matter movement was started. They know what we’re speaking out against. People just don’t want to address it and feel uncomfortable at the thought of addressing it. Everyone else is just trying to, not only deflect and sweep our issues under the rug, but also piggyback off of our movement and plights for our people.

When we’re trying to fight for justice and equality for our people, other groups of people playing off of and latching onto our movements makes our plight look like it’s not important or that other groups of people’s plights should be addressed and handled before ours.

When Black Lives Matter was created, it wasn’t to cause a divide and create hate. It was just to ask for justice and equality. That’s all we want.

Shaving: Is It Necessary?

 (Photo: Flickr)

Shaving is made to be a really big deal here in America, especially amongst women. I don’t really know much about how it’s viewed in other countries, but I know it’s a very common practice here. This post will be focused on women shaving. Is it as necessary as it is made out to be?

I remember first having the idea of shaving my arms and legs probably when I was about twelve or thirteen years old. I felt so ashamed and disgusted of my body hair. All throughout my teenage years, I saw so many girls with smooth legs and arms and would feel bad because I felt like I was the only girl that haven’t shaved. Of course, I saw the many commercials on television about shaving products that showed women with perfectly smooth legs. I’ve always wanted my legs to look like that. I never wore shorts, skirts, or short sleeved shirts because I was so ashamed of my body hair.

I would ask my mom if she would buy me some razors or if it’s okay for me to shave. She would always tell me, “No. They’re just trying to sell that stuff. You don’t need to shave.” My mom never believed in shaving. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her shave in my life.

Of course, I didn’t believe her whenever she told me that. It was really disappointing when she never got me any razors or let me shave. I thought I had TOO MUCH hair. There is a such thing as TOO MUCH hair, right?

But, one day, I found a disposal razor in the house. It was probably from one of my brothers. My mom was gone to work. I was so happy! I took that razor and shaved my arms and legs. Sure, I had a few cuts because I didn’t have any shaving cream and it was my first time shaving, but it was worth it. I was hairless. I had no more unwanted hair! I’ve been shaving my body since that day.

But as I got older, I realized that my hair would grow back very fast. It seemed like it grew back as soon as I cut it. And, on top of that, my legs are pretty big and since I have a little height on me, they’re quite long, too. And that’s just my legs alone. That’s not even counting the other places I shave. So, shaving my body would take a really long time to do.

I started to feel like taking all this time shaving just wasn’t worth it if it’s going to grow back so fast. But I just knew I still wanted a smooth, hairless body like the women I saw on TV. So, I continued to shave, despite how long it took and how fast it grew back.

A few years ago, I talked to one of my dad’s friends about wanting to shave my legs. She told me, “You don’t need to shave. Your legs are beautiful the way they are. Besides, razors cut you up.” She basically said the same thing my mom said.

This story leads me to today. I recently did some research on women shaving. I wanted to know where it came from and why it is such a big deal here. During my research, I found that shaving wasn’t really a big deal here before the 20th century because women used to wear big dresses that pretty much covered their whole bodies, so people didn’t see women’s body hair very much. But after the 20th century, shorter dresses and skirts were invented. That’s when a lot of shaving companies began to promote smooth bodies and advertise shaving to women. More revealing swimsuits began to be invented as well. At that point, shaving companies began to target women for underarm hair.

So, my mother was right all along. They push all these ads because they ARE trying to sell this stuff! They want women to feel some type of way about their body hair so they can spend billions of dollars on shavers, razors, waxes, depilatories, shaving creams, and many other hair removal products. But something tells me it’s far deeper than advertisers wanting to make money off of making women feel some type of way about their bodies.

Why did they feel the need to target women on their body hair in the first place? Men can have just as much body hair as they want and they’re never made to feel ashamed of it. Of course, shaving companies market to them, too, but it’s like they can choose whether or not to shave and still be accepted by society. Women can’t. Women just either have to shave or be deemed as unattractive.

I never really found a good answer to this question of why women seem to be targeted more for their body hair than men, but it sounds like it comes from sexism and misogyny. I think it’s part of trying to make women feel ashamed of themselves and unequal to men.

Shaving is not necessary. Body hair doesn’t hurt anyone. We have just been conditioned to be disgusted by hair that grows on/in certain places, especially on women. People should not be pressured into shaving, no matter how much body hair they have or where it is. Body hair is completely natural. There’s a reason why it grows back so fast after shaving it. It belongs there!

We should all be free to accept our natural bodies as they are. As a matter of fact, I feel like most women wouldn’t shave at all if they weren’t made to feel ashamed of their body hair—much like men. Women shave because they’ve been told for many years that their body hair is unattractive.

Why I Started Blogging

Photo: Flickr

I feel like I did everything I wanted to do at my job. I know there is something better out there for me. I feel like my skills and intelligence greatly exceed my job. And, to be honest, I feel like the job is beneath me. Even though I love my job and the people I’ve met there, I know it isn’t really something I want to do long term. 

I want to do something that I feel would put my skills and intelligence to great and proper use. And, of course, I want to do something I love. One of my worst fears is going into a job I won’t like. I used to always hear so many people around me, including some of my family members, complaining about how much they hate their jobs and the people on it. I never wanted to be that person.

I also want to do something where I can work on my own terms and be my own boss. I just really hate having people telling me what to do. Not that I have anything against anybody I work with. It’s just that it gives me an uneasy feeling.

So, since I know I want a job that I will love and will be something I have the skills for and something where I can make my own moves, I asked myself, “Well, what do you like to do?”

I love reading and I think I love writing even more. So, I thought, “What can you do that involves reading and writing?” Suddenly, it hit me. BLOGGING! Long before I thought about blogging, I thought about making YouTube videos. I just knew I had all these things I wanted to say and get off my chest. But, then, I thought that I wouldn’t be very good of a speaker. Since I have social anxiety, I don’t speak to many people and I don’t get to say what’s on my mind very much.

Also, I have a very hard time forming the words I want to say when I get ready to speak in front of an audience. I figured that out through high school and college speech classes. I didn’t want to get on camera and forget things I want to say or take long pauses to think of what I want to say and I didn’t want to take all that time editing because I feel like I will be doing a lot of it. So, I eventually passed on that (I still really want to make YouTube videos, though. Maybe I’ll try it some time on a later date).

On the other hand, blogging is perfect! (And is as close to YouTubing as I will get for now.) Blogging involves a ton of writing and reading. I will read about all the topics I think about writing beforehand. I will also read many other blogs. The best part about this is I don’t have to answer to anyone! I can call my own shots. I can write and read about whatever I feel like.

This will be the perfect way to express myself without feeling like I’m facing a crowd. Writing about these things will be a perfect way for me to spread my thoughts and messages to many people. I was a little skeptic when I first thought of blogging as a job. But after some reading about blogging and seeing many other successful bloggers, I knew it was possible. So, I decided to put forth the effort in trying to learn as much as I can about blogging and gathering together many things I feel I should write about.

I titled my blog, “My Sparking Thoughts”, because every post will be about the things I think about and sometimes I feel like they hit me like a spark. My blog won’t be centered around one specific topic. I will be writing about many different topics and most of them will be about things I notice in our society that I feel should be addressed, but doesn’t get addressed enough.

Most of my posts will be titled as questions because, usually, whenever I think of something, it comes to me as a question first. I will also present them as questions because I want to hear other people’s answers to these questions as well. I think that will make for a very good conversation.

I’m very excited to start my blog and share my thoughts with as many people as I can. Welcome to my blog! I hope you all enjoy what I have to say.